Dear Brunette Bitch,
Hi! How are you?!!? The reason I ask is because when you are backing up on a public street going about 35 miles an hour (backwards) you failed to notice that 1) you were going backwards and 2) my dear friend Rozanne and I were in the crosswalk and about a foot away from your car. At least you were looking backwards to make sure you didnt hit any cars because God forbide you cause any property damage...but you failed to check if any pedestrians would be hurt.
Oh and thanks for saying you were sorry - wait you didnt say that. All you did was roll your window down about an inch and screamed, "I didnt see you!" and then sped off to your mani/pedi appointment.
I should have ran into your car and gotten some damages.
Thanks again for a lovely afternoon!