Saturday, January 26, 2008

For Kerry And Natalie...

This is really only going to make sense to keep reading at your own risk.

Congratulations on your new home! I kept wondering what to get you guys and as I was wondering through the aisles,it appeared to me...the perfect present:

A little bit more about your present...
Name: Bernie
Age: None of your business
Marital Status: Divorced. I was married to Danielle for 7 years but she couldn't handle my dedication to my work. We are still friends.
Astrological Sign: Taurus
Occupation: Garden Gnome but I prefer the title Defender of the Garden
Favorite TV Shows: The Biggest Loser, Law and Order (who doesn't like watching Jack McCoy in action?), Talk Soup, Cheaters, The McLaughlin Group
Favorite Movies: Spaceballs, Edward Scissorhands, Rambo
Favorite Sports: Golf
Hobbies: Playing the saxophone, taking long drives up the coast, playing the ponies.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Laughing At Myself - Once Again...

I laugh at myself a lot. Some people have seen me just lose it at a joke that happened in my head and I just couldn't spit out the punchline. Its gotten to the point with some friends that they just shake their heads at me and say "That's Melissa". Apparently, Jake has gotten used to his mother's tendencies as well.

We were at Target on Monday and Jake had earned himself some Pokemon cards. After picking out the cards and picking up some other things, we headed to the registers to pay for our loot. Since Jake had earned money by doing some chores, I decided to give him some cash so he could pay for the cards himself. Because I usually give him exact change, this was going to be a new experience because I purposely gave him more money so he could figure out what to give the cashier. The cashier tells him the total and I tell Jake to give him $6. Jake looks at me and says, "How much is $6?" and I say "Jake, just count the money." And then I say under my breath, "Its Monet, Count the Monet!" and I just started laughing, hard. Jake did this slow turn and looked at me and then - rolled his eyes! I just couldn't believe it! Don't get me wrong, the fact that my child is as sarcastic as I am is quite entertaining but its one of those things that you don't want to admit that you are the dork in the relationship.

In case you need a refresher in the Count the Money department...

Thank goodness for Mel Brooks.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

The Cha Cha Slide

I just saw this commercial while watching the NE/SD game. HILARIOUS!!!

Damn Flu

I don't know how I got the flu but I got it. For the past 3 days, I've pretty much been restricted to the comfort of my bedroom. Its kind of funny how different life is when you are taken out of your routine. On Friday, I took Jake to school in the morning. For once, I was like one of those other mothers who drop their child off in their pajamas and look forward to returning to their homes. It was an odd feeling, let me tell you. Then, getting back home and forcing myself to not do anything was, well, hard. In my head, I had the laundry, the dishes, vacuuming, and general cleaning to do. Did I do it? Nope. Another odd feeling.

Then I started making some observations...
- I noticed that the hours between 2-5pm during the week are probably the slowest moving, same at home as at work.
- There are a lot of people in my building that are home during the day. Do they even work?
- Daytime TV is really bad.
- When you sit and wait for emails to show, they don't.
- Laptops and wireless internet are the best things ever.
- The doctor I got to see on Thursday is really, reeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaallllllllyyyyy cute.
- It seems like "The Godfather" is always on tv and thank goodness for that!

I was scrolling through the "Watch Instantly" section of Netflix, where you can view movies or tv shows online, and I saw season 1 of Dexter available. I have heard so many good things about the show and I had never gotten around to watching it. By golly, procrastination was about be put aside. I managed to watch the whole season and I don't know if I should be proud of this accomplishment or not. The show is sooo incredibly good! Its not as gory as I thought it was going to be (it has a little gore but honestly isnt as bad as some other stuff) and the characters do a good job of capturing your interest in them. Dexter is a blood spatter expert who moonlights as a serial killer. He doesn't kill people indiscriminately though, he only kills people who slip through the system. The show has more heart than I think people give it credit for. With the writer's strike going on, CBS has decided to put this show on. If you are even remotely curious, I suggest you take a chance on it. But to truly bond with Dexter, take the time to watch the show the way it was created, by watching the non-edited episodes.

Ok - time to go back to bed, I'm a bit winded.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Yes Papa Bear Yes...

This morning, I was up before the crack of dawn because of this cough that is aggrevating my patience. I woke up to find the beauty that is The Colbert Report on my Tivo. He has been having a recurring bit called National Treasure: Portrait of Stephen where he is trying to get his portrait into the Smithsonian. The last part aired with last night's episode. I swear, the man can turn my frown upside down! TV hasn't made me laugh so hard in a while.


Monday, January 14, 2008

Movie Review: No Country For Old Men

My friend let me borrow a few screeners she received so I managed to watch this movie in the comfort of my own home. Let me say - WOW. I had heard a lot of great things and one person with a negative review (cough*Derry*cough) about the movie so I was hoping it was going to live up to my expectations and it totally did.

Stop reading now if you don't want to be spoiled.

Javier Barden is just spectacular as the killer in search of a satchel full of money that Josh Brolin's character takes. This movie reminds me so much of the old Hitchcock films. You could probably line this movie up with something like North by Northwest and find a few character similarities. Hitchcock was famous for putting his lead characters in situations over their heads and all the while trying to save themselves for a sin that they are not necessarily guilty of but it turns out they are guilty of something. Brolin's character stumbles upon a drug meet gone wrong and abandons a man that is dying and finds a satchel of money and takes it home with him. Later that night, he returns to give the man some water (that he had asked for earlier) and not only finds him dead but the owners of the money in search of him. Some others are also looking for the money and have hired Javier Bardem's character to find it as well.

I swear, anytime Bardem entered the screen I wondered what he was going to do next. He was very meticulous and calculating when it came to killing. The scene that got to me was when he was in the gas station talking to the owner. Just standing there, eating his peanuts and making conversation but at the same time sizing him up to see if he should kill him or not. You could tell that the owner had that look on his face, that he knew he was dead and was just trying to process it. And I loved that Brolin's wife threw the "coin" theory out the window and I think that bugged him more than anything. He wanted to believe that the coin chose (like with the owner of the gas station) like a fate, but in the end - it was he who decided who died and who didn't. Maybe he didn't like that he had all that power of life over death and he wanted to put the fault on someone else (you stole the money, you deserve to die; you picked heads, it was tails).

The only thing that I would have liked to see was more Tommy Lee Jones/Javier Bardem interaction. It seemed that it would have been a really good rivalry with TLJ's no nonsense approach and Bardem's no nonsense killing. I was almost waiting for them to meet up but that never does happen. Quite frankly, the way it was left - was a little unsettling and bittersweet but I accept that some movies can't be tied together in a little bow and this is why it left the impression it did with me. But the more I think about it, its almost better that way too.

I highly recommend seeing this movie, so you know why Bardem will win the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor.

Final Rating: Worth Paying Full Price

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Meeting Up With The Meetups

This weekend, I was determined to try to fulfill one of my new year's resolutions, #9 to be specific - be more sociable.

So last night, a couple of friends joined me at karaoke in West LA where 5 meetup groups were converging to create quite the evening of socializing and bad singing. Let me say - total fun! Ended up meeting some really nice people and I got to sing in front of strangers. A good night overall.

This morning, I attended another meetup and went on a hike up Eaton Canyon in Pasadena. The hike is about 2 miles each way and your reward is seeing the cute waterfall in the canyon. A couple of the people that were at the karaoke event the night before, were also at the hike - so it was nice that I didn't know ANYONE there. In addition, I got to know a few of the people during the hike to and from the waterfall. When we got to the waterfall, one of the guys that I had been talking to kept saying that he wanted to jump into the little area at the base of the waterfall. This other guy and I egged him on and each of us offered to buy him two beers (each) if he'd jump in. I'll be damned if the guy actually took off all of his clothes (except the undies of course) and jumped in! He was followed by a couple of the other hikers who jumped in fully clothed. On the hike back, he made a comment about how everyone was shocked that he took off his clothes to jump in. I laughed because yes, it would be the most logical thing to do so you arent soaked on the walk back but, stripping down in front of strangers is what people were more shocked about. Ahh the memories.

And since I know you are thinking it - yes, I almost fell in...twice while jumping on the rocks in the river bed. I actually have a little scrape on my hand to prove it!

Friday, January 11, 2008

Well, Thats Always Going To Linger

A few months ago - I saw a video that was going through the net called 2 Girls 1 Cup. It was the curiosity that did me in. Needless to say, it was disgusting and it took me a while to wipe it from my memory.

Now, there is another video being promoted as sort of a sequel to that called 4 Girls Fingerpaint. Yes - its what you think it is. But...BUT its soooo much more than that. I'm not super quesy but holy crap - this has to be one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen. I actually gagged - more than twice!

This was one of those things that I wanted to know what people were talking about and I had to see it even though I knew much of what was going to happen. But it brought up something what point do you stop quenching your curiousity? Is there anything you wouldn't do? Where would you draw the line?

I saw my line...ew, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit just thinking about it.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Retirement Might Be A Bitch

This video ran at CES 2008 documenting Bill Gates's last day as CEO of Microsoft. Somehow, I like him even more after this.

Friday, January 04, 2008

New Year's Resolutions, the 2008 edition

I figured the best way to set up my goals for this year is to review what I have accomplished from the past. I looked back through the blog and I guess I haven't really made any resolutions since 2006. Go figure. Funny thing is that I'm still working on some of those!

Ok - quick recap:
Get a laptop - done
Take Tango lessons - done
Get my passport
Refresh my French - I actually worked on this!
Volunteer with Habitat with Humanity
Read at least one book a month - ongoing
Learn how to shoot a gun

Here is my 2008:
1) Learn how to shoot a gun - I don't know why this is number one but it is. Its not that I'm looking forward to joining the NRA or anything but I've always wanted to at least learn how to do it. I've already done my research and know where to go. Maybe this will help me with the shooting games on the Wii so Jake will stop kicking my ass.
2) Be a better cook - now, I'm not shabby but I realize that sometimes I make the same things a lot. Which is fine but I want to expand on my culinary talent. A while back, I bought a friend a cookbook called The Silver Spoon which is considered the Italian Bible of cookbooks. I was recently talking to him and he was telling me how every single recipe is a great treat to make and eat. Damn, back to Boarders.
3) Go to Italy - I've been wanting to go forever and dammit I'm going to go!
4) Get my passport - see #3
5) Refresh my Italian - see #3, back to Boarders!
6) Volunteer more - its good for the soul and I miss doing it.
7) Upgrade my look - tone up and get a mini-makeover. I'm kind of excited about doing this, except for the whole shopping thing. I should hire someone to do it for me. Whats funny is that I had mentioned this my friend last month and she was really excited about getting me to go on a shopping spree. And I mean so excited that I was kind of insulted. Its like when someone tells you "Wow, you look really nice today!" and you take it like you don't usually look nice.
8) Not be an idiot - easier said than done.
9) Be more sociable - its not that I'm not sociable but I don't like meeting new people. Its a comfortability thing I guess. If I'm introduced to someone by a friend, I feel that they have been screened and half the work is done. For some reason, I find this resolution filled with irony since half of my job is to interview people for my company.
10) Be Timely - I need to "get organized" and do things in a timely way this incorporates so much. I'm a huge procrastinator, its horrible and whats worse is that I'm very aware of it and still don't change it. I also tend to run late (duh, procrastination).