A year ago, a friend of mine died - when I got back from a trip to Vegas, I found an email that had been sent out by a coworker talking about what had happened to him. It affected me more that I can say when I heard about his passing. I wondered why I had been thinking about him recently - especially last week when I drove down and was listening to Mark and Brian through the desert. He loved that show (everyone we worked with loved that show) but I mostly get reminded by the hearty laugh one of those guys has that I'm thrown back to memories of our time at work together. Its odd how little things will remind you of your friends - songs, movies, restaurants, sayings. I guess thats the true testament of a friendship - carrying on the little things that make people unique and sharing them with other people.
Last night, I was cleaning the new pad and unwittingly opened a box with junk in it (I think I have 3 of these boxes left). You know the kind - the boxes or drawers where you throw paperwork, receipts, gadgets, gizmos, the box of perpetual procrastination. Well I finally got to it and came across the program of his memorial service (which coincidently was one year yesterday). I sat back and started to think about how much my life changed and the opportunities missed or seized that have come my way. I dont feel that I have necessarily "missed" any opportunities- I've declined offers and opted for a route that would satisfy myself and what I want for my future. But what is that future?
Today is my 6 month anniversary since I started working for this company and completely changing the direction of my life. Not that I was unhappy where I was 6 months ago, butI felt unsatisfied. Now I feel stressed out, overworked, and just plain tired! But I wouldnt change a thing.